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Have you ever found yourself replaying a conversation hours or even days later, wondering if you said the wrong thing? Have you ever found yourself in a spiral of self-doubt for hours or even days, wondering if you’d make the right decision?
Or lying in bed, exhausted, while your mind runs through every possible “what if” scenario?
If so, you’re not alone. Many of the individuals I work with in my psychotherapy practice in Burlington, Ontario, describe this exact experience: a mind that feels constantly “on,” even when they want to relax and rest.
What Overthinking Looks Like
Overthinking often shows up as:
- Replaying past interactions
- Anticipating worst-case scenarios
- Difficulty making decisions
- Feeling mentally drained, yet unable to stop thinking.
In clinical terms, this pattern is often referred to as rumination (focused on the past) or worry (focused on the future). Both are closely connected to anxiety and can keep your nervous system in a heightened state.
In some cases, rumination can be a common, often hidden symptom of OCD (Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder). While rumination is a key symptom of OCD, it is also found in depression and anxiety disorders. Common themes include replaying conversations, doubting moral/ethical choices, analyzing relationships (ROCD), or overthinking future events.
Why Do We Overthink?
Overthinking isn’t a flaw; it’s a function.
Our beautiful mind is designed to anticipate, analyze, and problem-solve. At its core, it’s trying to protect us. One of the great signs of evolution is our capacity to problem-solve under stress.
However, when that part of us becomes overactive, it can begin to treat everyday and ordinary situations as if they require urgent, repeated analysis.
Research consistently shows that rumination can intensify and maintain anxiety over time. This is one reason mindfulness-based psychotherapy can be effective: it helps individuals recognize and step out of these repetitive thought patterns.
When Thinking Stops Being Helpful
Many people I meet in therapy initially confuse overthinking with feeling productive or with reflecting.
But often, the opposite happens.
Instead of clarity, overthinking tends to lead to:
- Increased anxiety
- Greater self-doubt
- Feeling stuck or indecisive
It becomes less about solving a problem and more about staying caught in it.
Signs Your Mind May Be Stuck in a Loop
- You revisit conversations long after they’ve ended.
- You struggle to “let things go.”
- You seek reassurance, but the relief is temporary.
- You feel mentally exhausted without resolution.
What Can Help Shift Overthinking
There isn’t a single quick fix; however, there are practical, evidence-based ways to begin changing your relationship with your thoughts.
1. Gently Name What’s Happening
Noticing and naming overthinking—“I’m caught in a loop right now”—can create a small but meaningful shift. It helps you step back, rather than get pulled further in.
2. Create Containment for Worry
Setting aside a specific time to think through concerns (sometimes called a “worry window”) can reduce how much those thoughts take over the rest of your day. This approach is commonly used in structured anxiety treatment.
3. Reconnect with the Present Moment
Overthinking pulls you into the past or future. Small, intentional actions—stepping outside, moving your body, or focusing on your surroundings—can help bring your attention back to the present.
4. Work with Your Thoughts, Not Against Them
Rather than trying to eliminate thoughts, it can be more helpful to ask:
- Is this thought useful right now?
- Am I solving something, or circling it?
5. Support Your Nervous System
Overthinking is also physiological; you feel it in your body.
Slowing your breathing, even slightly, can begin to calm your system:
Inhale for 4 seconds, exhale for 6–8 seconds.
Longer exhales signal safety to the body, which can gradually reduce the intensity of anxious thinking.
When It Feels Constant
If overthinking feels persistent or overwhelming, it may be a sign that your system has been under strain for some time.
In therapy, we work collaboratively to:
- Understand the patterns underlying your thoughts.
- Develop tools to interrupt those cycles.
- Build a different, more supportive relationship with your mind.
You don’t need to resolve every thought that arises.Often, the most meaningful shift is not in finding the “right” answer,
but in learning how to step out of the loop.CONTACT US If you’re looking for support with overthinking, anxiety, or stress, psychotherapy can help you feel more grounded and in control